How to make the most of holiday lights festivals with a toddler

I don’t remember “holiday lights” being a Thing when I was a kid, but to be fair I swam competitively from elementary school through college, and swim season in the winter usually means doing little else. Now, though, it seems like every institution has some kind of holiday light festival, whether it’s explicitly Christmas-y or not.

A blurry, happy light-up photo.

What I love about these holiday lights displays, at least the one that we have chosen as our family’s annual tradition, is how joyous they are. We are whooping and hollering and oohing and aahing over every little light display. It’s truly one of my favorite “new” traditions and one that I try to schedule right after Thanksgiving so it kicks off the holiday season in style.

Timing is everything.

With a baby, and now a toddler, bed time is one of the hardest boundaries I hold. I know not every kid is like this, but I’ve got one that needs to snooze. It’s astonishing how my sweet and funny toddler turns into a (lovable) FERAL GREMLIN as soon as the clock strikes 7 PM when there is sugar coursing through their veins.

Luckily, we live in New England and it’s dark at 4 PM! So that’s when we always book our tickets. We go early, pack a lunch-as-dinner for my toddler, crush a s’more by the fire pit, and call it a night. Now that they’re a little older we usually can make it back for a proper bathtime/bedtime routine but as a baby and little one we would pack pajamas, do a final change/nighttime diaper there, and hope they conked out in the car and we could transfer. (Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t, but I’ll never not feel sleepy to Lord Huron from now on.)

I haven’t been to all of these, but here’s a quick New England lights/nighttime holiday round-up that I’ve pulled from friends and family:

• Night Lights at the New England Botanic Garden of Tower Hill in Bolyston, MA
• Christmastime in Old Sturbridge Village in Sturbridge, MA
• Winterlights at Naumkeag in Stockbridge, MA
• Boston Lights at Franklin Park Zoo in Boston, MA
• Winter Wonderland at the Strawbery-Banke Museum in Portsmouth, NH
• Holly Jolly Journey in Litchfield, NH
• Gardens Aglow at Coastal Maine Botanic Gardens in Boothbay, ME
• Freeport Sparkle Weekend in Freeport, ME
• Christmas Prelude in Kennebunkport, ME
• Christmas by the Sea in Ogunquit, ME or Camden, ME
• Wassail Weekend in Woodstock, VT

Let me know if you have a favorite in your area!

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Choose a lights experience that fits your family’s needs.

Part of this is the kind of place you choose to go to. I ended up finding our light show mostly because we are members there already, but here’s what I think works about it:

• It is a walk-through experience, not a drive-through one, so it’s very immersive and festive. (I mean, there is SO much to see. Our favorite spot is always the train village setup!)
• They serve real food so we can all have dinner. (As I mentioned I pack for my toddler so I know they’ll eat something.) It’s kind of lunch-y/pub-y but it’s real food, not just snacks or chocolate.
• They have fire pits at several spots throughout the experience so you can warm-up and/or toast a marshmallow or two, which is a big hit with my toddler.
• There is nothing else to see—just the lights. There’s no zoo animals or indoor playground or fireworks or whatever EXTRA AWESOME THING. It’s just the lights, which is overstimulating enough!
• Most importantly, it’s a place we’ve been to before, in the daytime, and we know the rules, we know where the bathrooms are, and we don’t need a map to get around. I can’t stress this enough—if you’re going to go someplace after bedtime, you gotta have an exit strategy, and this one is easy since we know where things are!

It’s okay to opt-out of holiday madness.

I think the biggest thing to remember with this is that it’s okay if you’re still not in a place to do this kind of outing. The same place that hosts the winter lights has a similar Halloween-themed event, which I got so excited about this year. But in October, it’s still light out at 4 PM, so we had to book a 7 PM ticket.

And it was an absolute disaster that ended in carrying our toddler out less than an hour in. I spent days trying to figure out what went Wrong and realized the time difference 🤦🏼‍♀️ Maybe you have a kid who goes to bed later or who hasn’t dropped their nap but ooof, we are just not able to do anything past bedtime right now. It’s okay if you can’t either! We often go with our good friends and they tag team with their two kids, switching off each year who gets to take their oldest out between their two under two.

All I mean by this is, there are a LOT of holiday events you can choose, and it’s okay to truly choose one or two, or switch it up each year. We did a meet-and-greet with Santa last year and y’know what? We will not be doing that again based on how my toddler handled it. (I *think* it was one of those overwhelmed-by-happy-emotion meltdowns? Who is to say?)

My favorite holiday books.

I say “holiday” on purpose because they’re mostly non-denominational or cover multiple holidays/religions in them:

Thanks for being here.

Toddlers 🤝 trains

The holiday season can be so magical if you let it. It’s a stupid amount of mental load for parents (usually Moms, let’s be real here) and I am feeling it. I have already baked literally eight dozen cookies and I’ve got several batches to go. Plus there’s a whole flurry of events to plan for—we’re taking a holiday getaway to Portland, ME for the Maine Narrow Gauge Polar Express that I truly cannot wait to experience—and we’ll be doing the Nutcracker for the first time, too.

Even when I feel a little overwhelmed at the chaos of the season, I try to remember the tree is lit, the fire is blazing, and the whole house smells like caramel and peppermint. Deep breaths, my friends. Deep breaths.

To the cookies I only bake once a year,

Kayla

If you liked this post, please consider supporting my work. I’m just a mom in the thick of the toddler years trying to create core memories for our whole family while minimizing meltdowns—I sincerely hope this helps you do the same.

This post was originally published on Travel with Toddlers. Subscribe for more real-talk travel advice, toddler-friendly itineraries, and tried-and-true gear recommendations.

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